[Blog] The Zest of Rest

By Allison van Tilborgh

In our 24/7, always-connected world, the idea of taking time out from work seems increasingly unrealistic. According to one recent study, more than half of employees continue to work while they are on vacation—and the rest feel guilty for not doing so. But what if unplugging were actually a positive thing for your business?

In 2022, researchers at Duke University found benefits of traditional Sabbath-keeping among a group of clergy. Those that adopted the ancient practice of forgoing work for a full day once a week reported improved mental health outcomes and a feeling of greater accomplishment at work.

While the roots of this kind of rest may be found in faith, the rewards are not only to be seen in the religious realm. Long known for shuttering its fast-food stores on Sundays in accordance with its funder’s beliefs, Chick-fil-A’s six-day-week earnings better many every-day-openers. According to a Business Insider article, that might not only be because employees are rested and refreshed, but because being closed provides “a sense of urgency” for customers to eat there when they can.

Having explored what The New Yorker described in an article as “The Quiet Revolution of the Sabbath,” I can attest to its benefits—even as someone working in an industry that never sleeps.

As a media consultant, I frequently meet business leaders on the verge of complete burnout. Their marriages are struggling, their kids feel disconnected from their parents and the pressure to meet payroll weighs on their shoulders. They are expected to be perfect visionaries, administrators, managers, leaders and strategists, all while maintaining a thriving family and personal life. The tension is unrelenting, but they are not able to be open and honest about their pain because their staff depend on them as a leader. If their leaders can’t “make it” how can they?

The pressure also extends to their families—particularly their children—who are constantly inundated with a steady stream of media that increasingly divides our nation, deteriorates their mental health and funnels them into a growing sense of isolation. Ask any teen if scrolling through TikTok is “relaxing” and you’ll find many are stuck in toxic cycles of technology addiction paired with feelings of self-inadequacy. Maybe laying alone in bed and scrolling for several hours at a time is not really “rest.”

A hard pause

In my career, I had tried all the modern productivity tricks: app “limits,” trying to put away my phone during mealtimes and even assigning “no plans days” in my Google Calendar to avoid over-committing myself. These were all helpful but, unfortunately, did not produce true rest—complete cessation. There were always “tabs open” in the proverbial browser of my brain.

And then I spent the Sabbath with a friend who is an Orthodox Jew in the Five Towns on Long Island, N.Y. Having grown up Christian, I was familiar with the Sabbath interwoven through the texts of the Old Testament. I understood it had something to do with “not working,” but I had no idea that the modern Orthodox also interpret it to include not using your car, watching TV, cooking, turning on and off light switches or, perhaps most peculiar of all, ripping toilet paper.

On the Sabbath, all sustenance and chores need to be finalized prior to sundown on Friday night and remain on pause until after the sun has set on Saturday. On the Sabbath, you are not supposed to do “mundane” things, like talk about finances or house renovations. Instead, your time is meant to be focused on catching up on sleep, visiting family, quality time with your spouse and the occasional walk around the block. You may be surprised to learn that an estimated 2 million people around the world follow these prescriptions every single week, without exception.

Part of the process sounds glamorous, even self-indulgent; other aspects seem self-emaciating and entirely undesirable. Is it realistic to imagine that any high-performing leader in America could ever lean into such “extreme” practices? Why would they? And what if I want to spend my spare time scrolling through LinkedIn or taking my car to the beach after a long day of making calls?

As a full-time organizational leader and business owner, these are questions I asked myself too . . . that is, until I experienced the liberating power of the Sabbath in my own life.

At first, an inexplicable anxiety overcame me. I was terrified of “all the things” that could happen while I was away from my phone. When would I wake up the next morning if I didn’t have an alarm clock? What if my team ran into a weekend emergency and needed to consult with me? What if something happened to a family relative, like a stroke or heart attack? My mind went to the worst-case scenarios. I realized I hadn’t been without my phone for this long in, well, since I got it.

And yet, none of these things happened on my first full Sabbath. Although the world turned just as fast as it did before, it felt much slower. For the first time in a long time, I slept in until 10 a.m. I read some of a book that I’d been meaning to get to. I met up with some of my friend’s neighbors and enjoyed a stroll in the charming neighborhood. Released from the pressures of constant media stimulation and productivity, I was able to engage in meaningful conversations about life, marriage, fears and hopes.

A renewed zest

What began as a novel concept (practicing a “radical” Sabbath) unexpectedly became a weekly part of life for my husband and me. The practice has taught me about myself and how a genuine practice of rest is necessary for anyone trying to navigate the nonstop world of 21st-century America, especially in “business.”

For about a year now, I have engaged in regular days of complete Sabbath. It began with once a month, then twice a month and then eventually became a weekly occurrence. It was actually my husband’s idea. Generally speaking, I was the one to come up with all the reasons we couldn’t commit to this practice, but it was his faith that made this practice possible. Everyone in my family knows they can’t expect to reach me from Friday night to Saturday night and, guess what . . . the world continues to turn.

Now, my Sabbath does not strictly adhere to all the Jewish proscriptions. Sometimes we start late or end early. I’ve taken to using a pen to underline sections of readings I like, even though you are not supposed to write on the Sabbath. If the candles haven’t burned out by the time we want to sleep, sometimes my husband will extinguish the flames rather than let them linger. And yet, what we are able to accomplish is incredibly fulfilling—physically, emotionally, relationally and spiritually.

You may have heard the phrase, “attention is the purest form of love.” Through many an al fresco breakfast on our porch, I’ve begun to notice the different species of birds that come and go through different times of the year. I have gotten to see butterflies leave their chrysalises for the first time, drying off their wings as they venture into the unknown. I finally notice the potent scent of magnolia flowers recently in bloom wafting through the air. In other words, I’ve begun to pay attention to what had always been there.

I am increasingly convinced that society’s radical woes warrant a radical response. War, famine, inequality and despair are rampant. The “default” response to today’s world is increasingly withdrawal or hatred. Too many of us rush through our lives, sometimes even unaware when we haven’t stepped outside for days at a time. We are tired but can’t identify why. Life itself has become exhausting.

In such circumstances, rhythms that seem “outdated,” “arbitrary” and “repetitive” have become moments for reconnecting with myself, away from the distractions that keep me from being attentive to what really matters. The Sabbath has given me a zest for life again.

Perhaps you cannot cease from labor on Fridays through Saturdays. But is there another window during the week you can entirely commit to rest? Maybe you prefer to continue to turn on and off light switches. But can you abstain from binging a TV show? Perhaps you need to use your phone to check your glucose levels or receive updates from a relative in critical care. But can you put it in the other room when it’s not needed?

Consider, for a full turn of the world, saying no to the expectation to be “productive.” If you have never kept a full Sabbath before, and even if you would not consider yourself to be a person of faith, I encourage you to give it a try—just once. When you do so, you’ll discover for yourself that you can fit more than 24 hours in a day and bring more of yourself to the other six days.

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